What Am I Even Supposed To Do To?

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You really should avoid dipping your pen in the company ink. If it goes wrong it could really wrong really fast.

It's possible, or perhaps likely, that nothing will happen in the first place. I don't intend to make advances on anyone, but if I happen to finally meet someone who seems interested and compatible, I'm going to explore it if I can.

If I was flushed with opportunities outside of work then I'd take those instead, but that's not my reality.

Your new career has likely improved your overall social status at least a little bit, hence might improve your prospects outside of work, at least so some extent.

Yes, that's true, but only if I'm actually able to meet people in the first place.

At least you can support yourself….that’s very important.

Glad you got the job!

Thanks

Well I was misled. I was told that my facial hair would not be a problem for the job but on my first day of training, I was told I'd be required to cut my beard short to work there, which was never an option for me.

So now not only did the job I was excited about fall through, but I've quit my old job (which I wanted to leave anyway) and ended up unemployed.

I think this might be the last straw for me. I'm done with this crap.

May I ask why trimming your beard was "not an option" for you such that you would choose to be unemployed, and among other things lose the opportunity to meet people, rather than trim it?

You will not meet nice people in a casino anyway.

Because it is a part of my appearance that I feel very strongly about keeping. Taking a job that condemns me to lose that for the foreseeable future isn't worth it.

If that doesn't suffiently convey where I'm coming from then I don't think I can make you understand.

You would still be "you," even if you've shaved off your beard.

Again, if you don't get it, you're probably not going to get it

Sorry it didn't work out.

The issue is them misleading you by saying it was ok. You wouldn't have taken the job if they said it needs to be cut short.

I would challenge them about that.

Thank you


I agree. That's exactly what I said to them, and I showed them the email correspondence I had with the HR guy who said I'd be fine. Unfortunately he was mistaken. The supervisors unanimously agreed that my beard was not suitable. The trainee coordinator pretty much used whatever angle they could think of to tell me that it wasn't going to work unless I cut my beard, including implying that an unwillingness to cut my beard could be an indication of an unwillingness to comply with other regulations, which is unfair for what should be obvious reasons.

They originally tried to say that the guy wouldn't remember how long my beard was but I told them I'd included that in the email. In the end they basically used the part of their policy that dictated that management gets to determine what is suitable.

The training coordinator seemed to feel bad for me. They said I could do a couple more days training while the decision was finalised but I felt that if there's no prospect of me being a dealer, all going there for a couple more days will do is taunt me.

I really wish this hadn't happened. I wish I'd known outright and got to reject the application of my own terms. I got really excited about being a dealer. I told everybody. Finally, something I could see myself being happy doing. I was always a bit sceptical of it actually happening up until I was told I'd be fine with my facial hair, at which point I finally allowed myself to get excited.

Now I just feel deflated. I'm depressed enough. I don't need more things to be depressed about.

Of course I “get it!”

Sorry this happened….but no reason to get testy.

Is there some religious reason you don’t want to mess with your beard? Personally, I have nothing against it.

Your beard can grow again once you’ve trimmed it. How much did they want you to trim it?

I can’t help it. I understand “principles”—but if the loss of this opportunity would lead to you feeling hopeless, why not bend a bit when it comes to the beard? It’ll grow back. I don’t like that you might be back to “square one.”

Maybe I don’t understand. What does the beard symbolize for you?

It’s not “selling out” if you trim the beard, I don’t believe.

I wish you could get in a trade union or something like that.

The bolded bit . That's a sign of a s**t employer.

You have evidence that they agreed it was fine. They are in the wrong.

Do you have anything like a Citizens Advice charity in your country? Services like this will be able to advise you on your rights, and what steps to take next - that is if you want to take it further.