Too Unattractive to exist, I would be happier dead.

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...The tittle say enough I think, I have both Aspergers and ADHD. I'm 19 and alone and I feel I will be alone for the rest of my life soo if I know the outcome why should I be alive anyways. I have herd stories of Autistic people who manage to live a normal live and have relationships but not for me. People tell me that looks don't matter of course I know thats just a bunch of crap soo thats all I guess and I was wondering if anyone alse felt the same.

hello, HollowJD
welcome to our neat little club in which you will find you are far from the minority.

Some people say attraction matters, and unfortunately that seems to be true for most, but that doesn't make it any less shallow. Considering such conceptions change all the time, it's about as senseless and stupid as things like fashion or following trends just because the media and society tell you to. None of that matters in regards to who you are. If someone can't get past appearances, you're probably better off without them.

I feel like this often. If I had no family I would commit suicide in a heartbeat. Feeling attraction is a prerequisite for most people for a relationship. People will tell you otherwise but they're just lying to make you feel better.

feeling is not knowing. you may be alone for the rest of your life, or not. the rest of your life might be another hour or another 70 years. it is certain that everything you think you have will be lost. there is no such assurance that anything you think you want will be attained. the mind grants undue emphasis to the gratification of desires, the idea of what it would be like for 'me' to have this or that condition met. were you more in touch with the present stress of wanting, you would be less enamored with the idea of having. given equal attention, the two cancel each other out. in terms of stress, not wanting is superior to having, as there is no threat of loss. when you are able to see more clearly the liability of the state of being you are expressing here, perhaps you will know to drop it. it is like holding onto a red-hot iron ball and being too absorbed in its beautiful glow to notice that your hand is being burned. let go of your expectations. you do not have to live a normal life in order to be happy.

It's the same for everyone, surely?

Totally agree with wornlight.

I also know how painful it can be, just to be alive, most on this site know too I guess.
Here you can offload some pain, in time feel better.

The problems associated with both ADHD and Aspergers improve with age as we adapt to the world and gain confidence in ourselves. You won't see that now because you aren't seeing any future for yourself, but that future will seek you out even if you can't glimpse it now.

Attractiveness matters most when you are in your teens, but most people look better in their 20s and 30s and it will matter less as you get older anyway. We tend to get obsessed with things, if your obsession has become about how you look, then try to develop another interest that won't be harmful to you.

You really don't know how your life will pan out, it really is likely to improve.

Listening to happy music all day helps pull you up too.

Post here when you feel its all too much.

Thank you for all the nice replies but that dose not change the fact. Society is a very depressing place. like I have said before Im really unattractive I'm really self conscious I never leave my home and I'm afraid of interacting with others, its hard because if someone gets past my horrid outward appearance then theres my poor social skills they have to deal with it. I know that the odds for myself to be in a relationship are relatively low.

I don't agree with you at all. A lot of being attractive isn't physical, it's confidence and being happy with yourself. If you broadcast "I am hideous and unloveable", people will take your word for it. My boyfriend is bald and overweight, but it doesn't matter to me at all. I find him super attractive because he is fun to be around, confident and happy with himself.

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People can grow into, and out of, their looks. No matter what you think you look like now, your face is going to shift over time. Just keep that in mind.

If I still looked as awkward as I did when I was a kid, I'd be in trouble.

Can't say that dating gets easier with age. Being older there are issues with dating woman with kids., woman your age who do not have kids and are set in their ways, and woman who are single because they are fussy.