Becoming not interested in relationships - can that happen?

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Hello everyone!

I am single for quite some time now. At first I thought I am not interested in men anymore, because I am not over my last relationship. However, I don't think thid is true anymore.

It is not that there are not enough men willing to ask me out (they do that quite frequently) but I just can't picture it. Even if I find them attractive, which happens rarely enough, I don't want to go out with them or kiss them or anything.

I feel like I become more autistic over time. Nobody has been in my apartment for over a year, because I can't stand letting anyone in. I don't want anybody (not even someone I feel attracted to) to touch me.

Is it possible to just stop having a love life?

<--- Stopped having a love life years ago.

In other news, I saw Meet the Press this morning. One commentator thought that those who are loners need to be told this to the police by their neighbors just in case they're planning something dastardly, like shooting up a movie theatre. Yikes! It may come to pass that you'd have to have company whether you wanted it or not.

Early 50s, no love life, never had one, never wanted one, fine with that--not the end of the world--solitary, introverted, hermit.

Never made plans to go on a rampage. Hey, all my meltdowns have been unplanned, but no, haven't ever planned an official rampage. No future in it, nothing to be gained. Would never plan on hurting strangers who hadn't done anything to me. That's stupid. Would rather the creeps who have tormented me reform instead. Besides, I've noticed over several decades of life that bad people tend to eventually have bad stuff happen to them, so those of my tormentors who didn't reform have probably been having lousy lives. I accept that as justice, and forgive those who reformed.

Will continue to risk living alone, and being hermit. However, I do take steps to protect myself from those afraid of loners. I say hello to the neighbors, and only wear one of my heads when I go outside.

Of course, you don't necessarily need a relationship but I don't think you should cut the prospect of having one completely. You should really what you feel comfortable with, not everyone has the goal of having a white picket fence and a few kids. some people can achieve great things without having a family, you might dedicate your life to creating some innovation that can benefit others, you might simply enjoy living alone by a mountain side.

My point is to do what you feel is right for you and don't let society dictate you into something you don't want to be in, I have seen this happen to several men and they are now stuck paying child support and have been through painful divorces simply because society dictate that they had to settle down before a certain age.

Well, I've got no business being interested in a relationship for the time being, because I want to get closure on my failed marriage first. AFAIK it's dead, but we're doing some e-counselling with Relate so we can move on properly (or reconcile if there's a miracle), so any kind of deep involvement with another woman is going to obfuscate that process and quite likely scare both women too.

I'm not numb to the desire though........I think that happens to people sometimes if they get nothing but failure for long enough, but with me it's more about calming down and getting comfy with being single again. It's all there, but somehow it doesn't take me over like it used to. I have a lot of work to do on my broken "partner selection filter" which has given me a whole string of partners who turned out to be wildly incompatible with me. I've managed to reject the most obvious maniacs - an otherwise lovely lady who flirted with me on a bus told me that her boyfriend was wrong to dislike her talking to strange men, because she loved him and would never be unfaithful.......she then told me (a complete stranger) her full address and when he'd be away I just thought "what is wrong with the picture?" and made good my escape. But that was a no-brainer. Others have seemed quite sane until it was too late to turn back easily.

Maybe if I fail again next time, I'll call it a day. I do rather despair of meeting anybody who won't turn out to be emotionally unhealthy.......I think the mainstream largely has its head up its butt, so that's most of them out of the game already.

I was the same for a long time, maybe u just aint met the right guy.