advice for finding romance when struggling with aspergers

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Hello, I am 18 years old and it is the end of my freshman year first semester in college. i will be going back in mid February for the second semester. I was wondering if anyone had any advice for finding a romantic relationship. i don't know where to start. i know these things happen organically, but i would appreciate some assistance or support from people struggling with the same situation that i have. i have social anxiety and get nervous around guys. i also have Aspergers and high functioning autism. i am heterosexual and a female. thank you.

Do you have female friends? Perhaps one of them can set you up with someone.

Really, it's going to boil down to getting yourself out there. Working on your social anxiety by practising interactions with others you meet is going to help you out a lot. I'm not sure how colleges work with societies/communities, but if there are any that peak your interest, that would be a good place to start too.

Approaching other people for conversation is a good way to go, but if there are instances where you want people to approach you, try to keep an open and inviting posture (no folding arms, etc). Make a conscious effort to improve your eye contact if that's something you struggle with.

You could also try going on Tinder or similar dating apps if that's something that appeals to you, but if you do, keep in mind that different people on there have different intentions with regards to meeting up.

I'd recommend not asking your friends to set you up with someone random as A) it makes you look somewhat needy, and B) it's generally pretty awkward for all parties involved, and rarely yields positive results. That's not to say you shouldn't try to meet people through friends (I'd encourage doing so where possible), but I'd try to let that happen naturally if I were you.

Really, increasing your chances to meet people via exploring different social routes is the best and most statistically sensible way to find a partner. You're probably going to have to venture out of your comfort zone a bit, but socialising gets easier with practice, and the alternative is having a much lower chance of meeting a prospective partner. Best of luck.

You could try internet forums. One advantage is that you can get a feel for others personalities from their post history. I met my 2nd & current girlfriend on this forum. My current watched my post for a while before PMing me. There's lots of guys in this section who are struggling with getting dates.

Her displayed age is 17 & most dating sites require users to be at least 18.

My parents were set up through a mutual fried & they're still married.

An addendum to my previous post:

I recommended having a friend hook you up for a few reasons. If you are not comfortable enough socially to have a group of friends, it will be hard to have a relationship that is more intimate than friendship. Focusing on building friendships is a good way to build the social skills necessary for a good romantic relationship. Also friends might have single friends who would be a good match for you. A good friend will be protective of you, and not try to hook you up with someone who is unsafe. This can help you with the screening process that is part of dating. It sucks putting a lot of energy into getting to know someone, then finding out that person is bad for you. A mutual friend will know something about both of your personalities, making it less likely that you will be incompatible. Last, a lot of people like to play matchmaker.

Don't fall into trap like I experienced when I first went to college. I am nearly finish my postgraduate degree and I am still a single virgin guy. I have no problems with it, but make sure you learn about yourself before others.

She said in her original post that she's 18...

And maybe asking to be set up works sometimes, I dunno. It just hasn't worked for me personally so the comment was more or less a speculation. The other disadvantage I see with being set up, especially when you have social anxiety is you skip the step where you get to know and feel comfortable around the person, and you plunge into a situation with vague romantic connotations straight away. To me, that seems more nerve-racking.

Message boards are only viable if you're okay with long distance, or you're lucky enough to find a fellow board member who happens to live near you, whom you hit it off with. Obviously there are instances where you can forge romantic relationships this way, but I'd have to think there are more efficient options.

i do, but they said everyone they know is an a**hole. i dont have many other friends to set me up either.