I have been far too picky in my past. Kept being told by others "There's plenty of time". Then one hits ones 40's and early 50's and reality sets in. The reality that finding someone special is actually very rare!
Don't let the age gap be a problem if you like him and get along well with him!
The only time age is an issue is if one personally thinks of age (Some people do) or if the age gap itself causes issues such as both liking different things to the extent that it is difficult to find common ground. Example is (I will take it to extremes just to show what I mean) if the girl is still into her teenage stuff and wants to go dancing etc, and the elderly gent is not up to such a wild life!
(It is perfectly legal for an 18 year old (Or 16 with parents permission) to date an 80 year old and marry here in the UK, though the practicalities of that and the fact that the marriage would be a short one so she would suffer his early death... But legally no one would be doing anything wrong... As long as they really love each other and care for each other so it is not about money (As young women have taken advantage and done this for the guys money in the past) why should anyone stop this? And it can happen the other way round too where an elderly lady and a young man fwll in love.
My eldest cousin fell in love when he was in his late 20's with a lady who was around 16 years older. A mutual friend told him that she was younger than she was and told her he was older than he was and they fell in love. By the time they found out each others ages, love was too strong to break and they married!
Despite the steriotype mindset, it is actually rare to find couples of their own age. Is common in school years for their first date, but in adult life in general it is not that common, as most couples have a 3 to 5 or more year age gap, and there are likely to be more with a ten year age gap than there are of the same age. This is logical as the availability of a potential partner ones own age is limited, where if one expands on this and widens the age group, for every year one widens the age group one amplifies the availability by a large margin...
(I would say one doubles the availability for every year one widens it, BUT the older one gets the fewer single people available there are, so instead of doubling every year, I would say doubling every three years if one is young and doubling every 5 or 8 years as one is older? And if one is a pensioner it is harder again because it is not only the availability of those who dont have partners are limited, but also many have died off... Though this can bring more being available!)
What I am saying is don't look so much at age if you find him attractive and get on well with him and he feels the same way about you.
BUT don't jump into things straight away either as go slow. Never rush! Try just dating if you want to.
If he is staff then there may be a hurdle as though real genuine love can flow between you, such things must be discussed with his employers to see where the limits are as it could be seen as taking advantage of the vunerable on his behalf... (Usually isn't the case but as it can be on rare cases, rules can be set up to stop this... Which if it is the case check this first. If he is a daycare patient, I see no problem whatsoever as long as you know his limitations and he knows yours. Love is love!)
My Mum said something to me in the past. She said "Finding oneself a wife (Husband etc) is one of the few areas where ages, religion, race, intelligence or ones social background (As in wealth status etc) does not matter". And she is right! Not saying it would be easy though as religious beliefs run deep so to marry someone of a different religion can cause issues, BUT LOVE overcomes. The same as a homeless person marrying someone rich. They may have a little conflict with oppinions, but LOVE overcomes! The same as race where ones background could be very different and cause problems, BUT LOVE overcomes! A person with a low I.Q. can marry someone with a high I.Q. As long as they really love each other! There may be problems but LOVE overcomes!
I write this as society expects certain things and many of these expectations destroy peoples futures as they try to comply. They would have been VERY HAPPY had they listened to the LOVE they had and not let society brainwash them into wrong ways of thinking!
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08 Nov 2023, 7:23 pm
