Just erased a bunch of Facebook "friends"

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Brianruns10
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18 Jul 2010, 4:01 pm

After a particular heated row with a FB friend, I came to a decision. I was fed up with a lot of people on my facebook. Most are from a three year period, when I went to an awful school, and I'm just ready to wash my hands of all those memories.

So, I deleted a good forty friends, and I feel very relieved, like I've finally put behind me a very bad time in my life, and now I can move on and focus on being better and more successful me!



Soledad
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18 Jul 2010, 4:13 pm

Brianruns10 wrote:
After a particular heated row with a FB friend, I came to a decision. I was fed up with a lot of people on my facebook. Most are from a three year period, when I went to an awful school, and I'm just ready to wash my hands of all those memories.

So, I deleted a good forty friends, and I feel very relieved, like I've finally put behind me a very bad time in my life, and now I can move on and focus on being better and more successful me!


That's good. Why don't you delete your facebook altogether? My therapist with a Ph.d who specializes in Asperger's and autism says that social networking sites such as facebook and myspace are minefields for folks like us. I agree, you don't have to agree with us, I'm just letting you know what an educated NT on autism thinks about those sites and how I agree with him. He says sites like wrongplanet are good though.

But hey, before I deleted my facebook altogether I god rid of all my "friends" or "links" I should call them for the same reason



Pistonhead
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18 Jul 2010, 4:51 pm

Minefields? Okay so we're going to die if we are on facebook? That's ridiculous, how well does this therapist know facebook? It's not like 9 million people trying to be your friend, you're talking to 99% people you knew in the past.

If anything I'd think that a forum would be *WORSE* for us because we can't just delete people we don't like here. We have to put up with them until someone bans them or forces them to back off.

I do clear my facebook pretty often.


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MissConstrue
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18 Jul 2010, 4:53 pm

:?


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gassy
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18 Jul 2010, 4:53 pm

Soledad wrote:
Brianruns10 wrote:
After a particular heated row with a FB friend, I came to a decision. I was fed up with a lot of people on my facebook. Most are from a three year period, when I went to an awful school, and I'm just ready to wash my hands of all those memories.

So, I deleted a good forty friends, and I feel very relieved, like I've finally put behind me a very bad time in my life, and now I can move on and focus on being better and more successful me!


That's good. Why don't you delete your facebook altogether? My therapist with a Ph.d who specializes in Asperger's and autism says that social networking sites such as facebook and myspace are minefields for folks like us. I agree, you don't have to agree with us, I'm just letting you know what an educated NT on autism thinks about those sites and how I agree with him. He says sites like wrongplanet are good though.

But hey, before I deleted my facebook altogether I god rid of all my "friends" or "links" I should call them for the same reason


Id imagine not having facebook would only be beneficial from individual to individual.

For me I have a lot of friends who live in different parts of the country, and instead of emailing (where i constantly forget to reply) facebook is useful for keeping in contact. Also its a useful/efficient/cheap way of organising largish scale events.

So therefore deleting it would not be beneficial for me personally, but in some cases like your own it might very well be. I guess it depends on what you use it for in the end, and what role it plays in your life



aleclair
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18 Jul 2010, 9:54 pm

Soledad wrote:
...My therapist with a Ph.d who specializes in Asperger's and autism says that social networking sites such as facebook and myspace are minefields for folks like us....


The difficulty with this statement is there are some social situations where if you're not on Facebook, you might as well not be a person. Two years ago, I believe there was a survey done at one liberal-arts university where 96% of the incoming freshman class had Facebook; I'd imagine, by now, it's closer to 98-99%. By not having that method or outlet of communication -- as stressful as it might be -- I think you'd find it much more difficult to meet people in real life, since it would be much harder to find or contact you.

I came to this thread, though, because I have been planning on doing the same ever since about two years ago, but never have. I figure, enough people have removed me (at least 10 but not yet 20 -- I don't keep count) that it's a common enough situation.



Auriya
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19 Jul 2010, 3:38 am

lol i just deleted some stupid girls.... I QUIT SMOKING FOR 2DAYS...CAN'T WAIT TO SATURDAY TO GET DRUNK!!
I really hate people with status messages like that...


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SaNcheNuSS
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19 Jul 2010, 4:17 am

facebook is where the monkeys show the other monkeys how important they are



zena4
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19 Jul 2010, 4:40 am

Congratulations Brianruns10 :thumleft:
Sometimes, it takes courage to do such a thing.
How do you feel about it today?



Brianruns10
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19 Jul 2010, 10:14 am

Still feel good. After the fight I had with an old grad school acquaintance, I started to look carefully at my friends list, and I realized, "There are a lot of people here who I don't care about, who clutter my page with their constant newfeed updates about what they're eating at a given moment, etc, etc. I went to an arts program, so there is a high quotient of self important, needy people who constantly need to let everyone know what they're doing. They're a-holes.

One thing I've noticed already: since I erased twenty or twenty five people, out of the more than two hundred I've got as friends, my newsfeed updates have dropped to almost nil. I guess that's because the rest of my friends are OUT WORKING and DOING THINGS, as opposed to talking about doing things...

It feels great to put behind a really bad three years of my life...at least the school gave me a full ride, so I didn't have to pay for their shitty education. F U SIU CARBONDALE!



starquake
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19 Jul 2010, 11:20 am

I've just deleted all my contacts in FB a few days ago. plus all the things I've just posted in a few weeks of trying hard to act NT as much as possible. It was ignited by losing a potential friend IRL because of my own stupidity.



chessimprov
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23 Jul 2010, 8:24 pm

It varies from person to person, but since there is/can be a social aspect to Facebook, I think it is easier to just not deal with it. The therapist is certainly not wrong in my opinion, this is one approach you can choose to take.

Personally for me, I've been able to use Facebook more as a helpful social tool. It doesn't tell you everything of course, but it can help cue you in to things. Like if you feel a person is not answering you irl but you're not sure, you can also say stuff on their FB wall. If you know that you can't see stuff that others can, or you know that your so-called friend logs on to FB like everyday and doesn't respond to anything you say, you know you are just 2nd class (or lower). So, without making a big fuss about it, you can just delete them and not hang out with them (or only hang out with them doing what YOU want to do and when YOU want to do it). This has worked well for me. I still question people or feel I have to keep people for awhile so as not to offend them, but eventually I seem to know at some point who is going to be deleted, lol. So personally, it works great for me!