What you hate more: Ignorant Criticism or Patronizing Praise

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Which do you hate more?
Ignorant Criticism 27%  27%  [ 6 ]
Patronizing Praise 73%  73%  [ 16 ]
I've experienced neither (Liar) 0%  0%  [ 0 ]
Total votes : 22

Asperger96
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28 Oct 2013, 4:07 pm

My First Poll. Fingers crossed.

What do you hate more: Ignorant Criticism or Patronizing Praise?

Ignorant Criticism: This is when someone criticizes you on something you really can't help.
Example: You can write neater if you try, just on the assumption that no one else has suggested that same thing in the last 13 years of your life

Patronizing Praise: When someone praises you on something that no else gets praise on. They are trying to be nice by making a big deal out of something everyone else around you does fine
Example: You hit the ball on the first try? Way to go! Wonderful! Good Job! Do you know what to do next?



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28 Oct 2013, 4:37 pm

Patronising praise.
I get ignorant criticism more often, though. People tend to err on the side of assuming that my strengths are the only thing that they should judge me by (you're smart, you should be able to do everything!).


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Asperger96
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28 Oct 2013, 4:39 pm

Personal Opinion: Patronizing Praise

Criticism is easier to counter. You can fight it. But Praise is more embarrasing. You can't win. If you take it you look dumb. If you fight it you seem ungrateful.



Willard
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28 Oct 2013, 4:42 pm

I despise patronizing praise as annoying, but ignorant criticism and condescension actually make me angry. :evil:

People who have no concept what living with autism feels like have no right to tell me what I am or am not capable of, or to form judgements about the degree of my efforts. Don't think I'm trying hard enough? I have a neurological dysfunction - let me crack your skull with a ball peen hammer and see how well you continue to function. :roll:



lostonearth35
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28 Oct 2013, 4:47 pm

Ignorant criticism. These days I think we're lucky to get any kind of praise instead of just criticism because many if not most people just enjoy being jerks.

-On the other hand I really don't like when some people tell me how "far I've come", meaning how well I now manage my Asperger's. Every meltdown I have makes me think the opposite, especially this past week on Friday when I was already depressed and anxious and my social worker wouldn't stop asking me questions where my only answer was "I DON'T KNOW", and when I say that I mean it! :x

-Yeah, when people praise you for actually doing something right that everyone else does they're hoping you'll do it more often or correctly from now on. Hate to burst their bubbles, but praising me is not suddenly going to improve my gross motor skills and catch a ball every single time it's thrown to me. Especially when it always seems to be thrown *at* me, like right at my face.



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28 Oct 2013, 5:07 pm

It's kind of a tie, I voted for (against?) patronizing praise, but ignorant criticism engenders my incendiary fuming rage, often expressed only as silence though. I don't appreciate P.P. (patronizing praise, not peepee, but it is a funny coincidence) "correctly". lol



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28 Oct 2013, 5:46 pm

If it's obvious/public I find patronizing praise to be more vexing. I generally take criticism as a way to improve and adapt.


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28 Oct 2013, 7:36 pm

Patronizing praise is far, far worse than criticism can ever be. It's so incredibly humiliating!

Willard, patronizing praise is always condescending.


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auntblabby
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29 Oct 2013, 1:20 am

patronizing praise is better than no [quasi] positive attention at all, I suppose, it is a world better than ignorant criticism.



opal
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29 Oct 2013, 1:26 am

auntblabby wrote:
patronizing praise is better than no [quasi] positive attention at all, I suppose, it is a world better than ignorant criticism.


I rarely get praise, patronising or otherwise. I get more than enough ignorant criticism.



auntblabby
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29 Oct 2013, 1:28 am

opal wrote:
auntblabby wrote:
patronizing praise is better than no [quasi] positive attention at all, I suppose, it is a world better than ignorant criticism.


I rarely get praise, patronising or otherwise. I get more than enough ignorant criticism.

yes, that is why i'm a hermit.