When you know more than the people around you...

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SilverProteus
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22 Jul 2007, 2:33 pm

It's amazing how many things can seem like a battle of wits to some people. If you say too much, throwing in many facts; historic dates, did-you-knows, trivia etc. into a "casual" conversation, you'll be seen as arrogant and extremely condescending. If you know a lot about something but choose not to say anything, trying to not sound arrogant, you suddenly become one devoid of opinion in the eyes of others, passive.

I really don't like small-talk. If I get pulled into a conversation on whose got the best six-pack in the film 300, I just might turn it into a monologue about Spartan history in a heartbeat. People see it as a display of arrogance, but I see it as making the conversation more interesting. 8)



hyperbolic
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22 Jul 2007, 5:15 pm

In a social setting, who expects logic and a vast array of information to dominate the conversation? Not NTs, at least. It's all about being "gregarious." NTs don't have time for rational argument in a social setting (not that it is impossible for them). Social interaction is a game of split-second moves.



bc1
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22 Jul 2007, 5:15 pm

[quote="sinsboldly"]a plumber was called because the steam heat was not working in the apartment building and it was freezing! The man came and looked at the maze of steam pipes in the basement and pondered how they all went up out of the basement and looked at the boiler and then walked over to a small valve waaaay up in the corner, took out a small silver headed ball peen hammer and tapped it twice. The whole system chugged and then started working perfectly humming right along. The plumber gave the manager of the place his bill.
" $1000.00 dollars for tapping with a hammer? This is out RAGEOUS, I want an itemized bill! !So the plumber took back the bill and scribbled on it :
"Hammer tap, $1.00,
Knowing where to tap, $999.00![quote]

the bill is incorrect. if a hammer tap costs $1.00, the bill would be $1001, because he tapped twice. i would either tell the plumber's boss he was giving away free hammer taps, which could be considered a thousand dollar loss for the company (since knowing where to tap is part of the hammer tapping service). or, i could refuse to pay the bill because it does not accurately present the services rendered. the case might not hold up in court because i am actually getting free stuff, but that might be irrelevant.



computerlove
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22 Jul 2007, 5:54 pm

^^^ you sir, are a funny guy :lol:


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gwenevyn
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22 Jul 2007, 6:39 pm

"Have you ever been going somewhere with a crowd and you're certain it's the wrong road and you tell them, but they won't listen, so you just have to plod along in what you know is the wrong direction until somebody more important gets the same idea?"
James Hilton

Came across this quote and thought of your thread. :wink:



computerlove
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22 Jul 2007, 8:26 pm

^^^^ that has to be something like the herd behavior... "I'm with (my) stupid (leader)" even if he is wrong.
Never understood that, fear or change?


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NeoPlatonist
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22 Jul 2007, 9:15 pm

I just try to avoid talking too much about things I know a lot about because people seem to perceive me as arrogant about it. I also avoid talking about things I don't know a lot about because that is the domain of fools and a**holes. So essentially, I just don't talk much any more.


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computerlove
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22 Jul 2007, 9:33 pm

I'd love to talk about what interests me with my peers, but unfortunately at school they don't teach much of what I'd like to talk, nor get a chance to talk about it, and it actually it's a huge part of our career (graphic design)! !!
It seems as if in my school there aren't many people who know about graphic designers and all things related. I've only found that in a couple of teachers who love (and breathe) design ;)

I compensate this by being a member of some forums, and visiting lots of sites, where I gladly see lots of movement :)


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NeoPlatonist
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22 Jul 2007, 9:43 pm

@computerlove
I feel the same way about the theater design (lighting and sound) that I do. I have no one at school to talk about my ideas except my professors. I'm pretty good and I think that the few other designers here feel like I'm bragging if I talk about it. I am always being accused of overkill when I think that I am just being complete. I always go the extra mile because I see it as my duty to the production and maybe they think I hold them to the same standard. If I go back next year, there won't be any more student designers.


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computerlove
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22 Jul 2007, 11:38 pm

Hi Neo :D
I totally feel the same way, I'd love to have some talk, and not a "deep philosophical" talk, just some talk with my peers about what we are studying, but feel that no one wants to, that no one is interested...

And it's a shame. I have a teacher that loves to talk about painting, she was my teacher, and it feels so good to have some talk with someone that knows and loves to talk about colors, analyze paintings, and analyze what the painter wanted to express. We even have gone to museums from time to time. And well, needless to say, I love my teacher :)

Not so long ago I was talking with another teacher, he surprised me when I showed him a poster in my computer (Shigeo Fukuda - Victory 1945), and he said "Oh, Shigeo Fukuda - Victory, nice poster"
That poster is actually the reason that made me want to become a graphic designer :oops:

One can learn so much more from a teacher, and not only teachers, from everybody else. I recently was in a talk with two teachers, the one of the poster and another one, and both agreed that one learns so much more when you exchange viewpoints with your peers, which is a shame I don't see much of it in my school...

I'm also good at what I do, have one the best scores, and I'm constantly asked by people to help them :) And no, I'm not bragging, it's just that I love graphic design, and well, it's my life. I'm also constantly looking to go, like you, an extra mile, two extra miles, the ones that I know are needed.

But sometimes I feel left out because I want to be better, not because I want people to think "I'm better than you" and stand out, I do it just because I am like that, I do it because I want to be better, a better me. Just like you said Neo, "Overkill..." "A perfectionist..."

Shigeo Fukuda poster:
http://www.universityofthepoor.org/scho ... ictory.htm


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Taken
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26 Jul 2007, 6:18 pm

Ahhh yes they will label you arrogant. a know it all and so perhaps it is better to keep the silence. Better to let the blind lead the blind than to throw your pearls before the swine. :lol: :D Incidentally I am a business major, intend to go to law school after I finish the undergraduate degree. I am plagued by an incessant need to state the facts as they are so NOT speaking up is torment to me. :lol:
I always just tell folks I'm from Baltimore and they nod knowingly. Here in the south they expect Yankees to be arrogant.



Crazy_Ben
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27 Jul 2007, 5:08 pm

I don't mind even cutting down visiting professors in mid-lecture, and my bio. prof. says I have a brilliant career ahead of me! It all depends on the social forums you interact with a lot. I know NTs don't like science or math or philosophy or anthropology or any thing else I love greatly, yet I don't try to avoid them and me and my best friends are seen, at times, as being arrogant cultural elitists (which I don't particularly deny). If you know me, you know how open with all of my knowledge I am, though I ocassionally 'go after' someone in a class I think is a shoddy thinker- they're usually the ones showboating is the thing I can't figure out!


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27 Jul 2007, 5:54 pm

Crazy_Ben wrote:
I don't mind even cutting down visiting professors in mid-lecture, and my bio. prof. says I have a brilliant career ahead of me! It all depends on the social forums you interact with a lot. I know NTs don't like science or math or philosophy or anthropology or any thing else I love greatly, yet I don't try to avoid them and me and my best friends are seen, at times, as being arrogant cultural elitists (which I don't particularly deny). If you know me, you know how open with all of my knowledge I am, though I ocassionally 'go after' someone in a class I think is a shoddy thinker- they're usually the ones showboating is the thing I can't figure out!


Overcompensation probably.



Crazy_Ben
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28 Jul 2007, 1:09 am

I had a philosophy professor ask me after a class once, "Beeeen, do you know if they teach criminology majors how to write papers? These ones are just terrrible."
But myself, I think there are lots of people that have something interesting to say, and I'll hear it if it, but is not purely dumb. On the other hand, I often get that people think I'm a professor because I know so much, and how can that hurt me?


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Crazy_Ben
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28 Jul 2007, 1:10 am

:roll: Ouch benadryl is hurting my typing. Good night folks!


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sinsboldly
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28 Jul 2007, 2:23 pm

bc1 wrote:
sinsboldly wrote:
a plumber was called because the steam heat was not working in the apartment building and it was freezing! The man came and looked at the maze of steam pipes in the basement and pondered how they all went up out of the basement and looked at the boiler and then walked over to a small valve waaaay up in the corner, took out a small silver headed ball peen hammer and tapped it twice. The whole system chugged and then started working perfectly humming right along. The plumber gave the manager of the place his bill.
" $1000.00 dollars for tapping with a hammer? This is out RAGEOUS, I want an itemized bill! !So the plumber took back the bill and scribbled on it :
"Hammer tap, $1.00,
Knowing where to tap, $999.00!


the bill is incorrect. if a hammer tap costs $1.00, the bill would be $1001, because he tapped twice. i would either tell the plumber's boss he was giving away free hammer taps, which could be considered a thousand dollar loss for the company (since knowing where to tap is part of the hammer tapping service). or, i could refuse to pay the bill because it does not accurately present the services rendered. the case might not hold up in court because i am actually getting free stuff, but that might be irrelevant.


The first tap was complimentary.

But thank you for making the point of why most people in a social situation would think that you were starting a social contest and playing "one upmanship". If I were NT I would have thought all sorts of things about your character and your parental legitimacy, etc. However, being AS, I can set your mind to ease quickly with a rational statement about the above anecdote. I will also apologize for not mentioning it in the original story, as not to disturb your sense of balance.

Merle