Asperger traits in girls

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sorry my brain seemed to be moving faster than my fingers when I typed that first comment...
beating your kid because she (or he) is gay is just insane

i totally agree

just started eval process with daughter today. she took the Wechsler and seemed to do ok, but i was surprised at the section of the test in which she had to make comparisons between 2 objects. IE~ Interviewer asks: " how are shoe and shirt alike?" daughter answers:" they both start with sh" Interviewer: " how are red and blue alike?" daughter: "they're both primary colors"....i can't remember one of the questions he asked her, but i *do* remember her arguing with him about how the 2 things he stated were not alike at all.
she fidgeted the whole time with her necklace~sucking on it and twirling it. hope tomorrow goes well. interviewer said that we may have to set up 2 more appts...he did say, though, that i should try contacting district as he's had luck with other clients getting district to pay for at least part of the eval.....hope he's right.

The more I learn about AS the more I think my daughter has it also (son was diagnosed 03/06). However she is 15 and is coping a little better than my AS son. So I wonder if it would help to have her diagnosed...

Yes. If you want her to be able to get any accommodations in highschool or college, being diagnosed is helpful. I pass really well. But it's really helpful (at 43!) to have gotten a diagnosis so that I can say "yes, there really is a neurophysiological difference, I'm not just being weird on purpose."

"Also, when she was younger and in a play setting with other kid(s) the rules of play were always according to what SHE setup. If someone wanted to play differently or alter the rules she would get very upset."

Oh yeah, I remember going through that phase.

daughter had HUGE meltdown at mall today. hand-flapping, screaming.....said that she doesn't think she has any friends because of her meltdowns.
how do you respond to that ????

Well if I lose my temper and consequently yell at any of my friends - I make sure I apologise as soon as I calm down afterwards.

If I can I explain why I got so upset, and how my friend might be able to stop me from going nuts next time, for example by asking me to consider whether the whatever it is - is really important enough to get stressed about and what the most constructive thing I can do is. Often the tantrum is from sheer frustration, I can't do anything about it - and so once I think clearly enough to see any action is pointless - it helps me calm down.

Ie that little poem (what works just as well for athiests as believers)
God give me strength to change what I can,
to accept what I can't change and
wisdom to know the difference.

Friends (or mums) can definitely help you out with the wisdom to know the difference.

The think about having a temper tantrum, is that it is scary for other people, ie your friends and they need to be reassured that you're ok and you don't blame them for your anger. Anyone who thinks you are angry with them, is likely to avoid you.

And nearly everyone has lost their temper from time to time, not just aspies. Anger and temper tantrums can be used for good - they're not always a bad thing.

wobbegong~ thanks fo rthe reply...she still does not seem to have much of an understanding as to why she tantrums...and she definitely does not seem to understand that an apology is in order. at the moment, she's at the point in which she feels that the tantrums are not something she can control nor reduce nor eliminate. her tantrums seem to be increasing both in intensity and frequency. the last time she tantrumed she said that it was my fault because i wouldn't get her what she wanted. ...the time before that it was my fault because i wouldn't let her push the shopping cart at the store.
really, she's in need of social stories. wish i could find some at the library instead of purchasing....