Things you were told as a young girl

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Grandma: "Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?"
Me: "Um, exactly who is "the cow" in this scenario?"

It was a complete disconnect between us, how I viewed my grownup life versus how she viewed her grownup life (and how life should be for women).

She did warn me not to ride a boy's bike, though, otherwise, "you'll fall on [the bar] and break your crotch and never have children!"

I did wreck on my (boys) mountain bike at one point and it hurt a lot and I didn't pee right for about a month. But I did go on to have children.

"You're just like your father."
"You're your own worst enemy."
"Stop playing videogames!"

My mum is actually a great mum. She just gets frustrated with me a lot.

When I was 12 years old, and 5ft 3 with a 25 inch waist, my parents, and my aunt got on my case, about my eating, and my sexist father said, "When you grow up, I want you to have a nice figure, like you do, now."

I'm now 5ft 7, and I'm twice as large and as strong, as I was, at the age of 12.

"When you write a best-seller, you'll build a whole wing on your house for me, right?"
"You'll marry a rich man for mommy, won't you?"
"I wish you were thin. You're too young to be so fat."
"Do you have a boyfriend yet?"
"Stop crying. It's self centered."

As you can see, my mom holds a lot of high expectations of me. D:

I got that from my grandmother, too! When my husband proposed, she wrote us a note in which she said, "I can't say I expected this." (She's really a mean old lady.) My husband and I had been living together for a while. I used to think, a) I am not a cow and b) I'm getting "milk" too!

My parents' weren't gender specific.

"Look at me when I'm talking to you!"
"Don't use that tone with me, young lady."
"If you're going to stand there and stare into space, go do it somewhere else!"

I think I have the only mother ever who meant the following as a compliment:
"Oh, I hope you have a daughter just like you when you grow up!"

"Only whores wear red shoes."
"Only whores wear black tights."
"If you don't wear shorts under your dress, a boy will come and rape you."
"Girls are meant to bear children and obey their husbands."
"Divorce is a sin."

There's much more.

if keep at reading like you do now you'll go completely blind within a month (Oh Grandma I'm not completely blind lol. )

If you play the harp your fingers will get clumsy.( I used to watch the Marx Brothers when I was little and loved the harp because of Harpo .

If you play the saxophone your lips will look like a black man's before you know it. (My grandma's old fashioned well meaning racism i guess lol)

You shouldn't drink things like Coca-cola, the caffeine will make you angry like those wreselars on t.v.

Why do you read all the time? Men don't like girls who read, it makes them nervious.

Lol. I played the sax for 10 years and it didn't make my lips super big, silly grandma.

"Be nice to your brother, he'll be stronger than you one day and he'll beat you up."