How are YOUR social skills, and...

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...if they are relatively good and you can pull of charm and/or charisma (at least some of the time) have people called you a sociopath?

I promise you I'm not one LOL.

I'm just curious.

One very good friend somewhat seriously suggested this about e to another friend in the past and although I do have a lot of ASD traits I am not (always) impaired in the ways that usually lead people to think of Asperger's.

Just wondering if there are others on the spectrum who have decent social skills and have had the same experience.

I'd like to NOTE that I've never actually done anything sick and twisted, I guess people think this because I used to change friends very easily and fall out of contact with people for months at a time.

My social skills can be decent depending on the day. I think I tend to come off as "overly nice" and a pushover. :\

My ex at one time was diagnosed as a psychopath. He is far from that. He's simply a profoundly gifted person with Asperger's who has very little use for most of the human race. He actually goes out of his way to help others and is one of the most ethical people I have ever known.

I am a very jealous person, I seem to get jealous of people easily, to the point where I get quite nasty. Well I've calmed down a little bit now, but when I was a teenager I was awful. If any of my cousins were seeing their friends, I used to get all sarcastic and nasty, simply because I was jealous of them for having friends and I didn't. And people used to think I was ''ruling people's lives'' and ''not letting people have friends''. So basically people called me ''a control freak''. But nobody understood that it was because I felt so lonely and that there was nobody else I knew who struggled with having friends and that I was expected to accept this all on my own.

It's always been ''just because YOU have got no friends doesn't mean everyone else can't have any friends!'' And it made me feel so guilty but also so jealous. It was a strange emotion. If I had better social skills and more chance of having friends, then obviously I don't think I would be so jealous and nasty about others having friends, so I am not a sociopath. And I know that because (although occasionally I get jealous and upset), I've got some descent friends now and so have reduced being jealous of other people now, which is good.

I have been called an a**hole a few times (well, more than a few times LoL) BUT i have never been called a sociopath.

But, i am aware of how others see me to a great degree .

In general, people under estimate me.

TheSunAlsoRises

SylviaLynn, Bingo! Anybody who's really into music understands that blind people are some of the finest musicians. The blind compensate for their lack of vision with extra-acute hearing. Aspies and sociopaths actually do some compensating of their own.

There are three types of rules we're all expected to follow: Formal rules (e.g., laws, policies); moral rules; and social rules. Not being able or willing to follow any set of these rules will put the individual at odds with society in big ways. Aspies tend to compensate for their inability to follow social rules by becoming sticklers for formal rules and morality. Sociopaths tend to compensate for their inability to follow moral rules by becoming particularly adept at the social rules--that is, they tend to compensate by being very charming.

I have a childlike social demeanor. I say what comes to mind, or I stand around not saying anything with a straw in my mouth gurgling my drink. I am incapable of NT adult socialization.

I can be sociable - and even charming - when the occasion arises and I am in the right mood.

I've never been called a sociopath, though last year one of my colleagues called me rigid and ideological. I took it as a compliment.

My social skills in my house... OK

My social skills outside of my house... hehehe... nonexistant. I have to be persuaded to say hi to people I don't know.

I think my social skills are a lot better than they used to be. I've had some people say that they "couldn't tell" that I had Asperger's. But other times, people seem to know that something is a little "off" about me, and treat me as though they might treat a child.

I have been told my social skills are fairly good. That, by the psychologist who diagnosed me with PDD-NOS, and which was the reason she didn't think AS applied (anymore).

As a child into early adulthood, I was quite the pushover. It was very obvious. I knew it, and it was clear to me that others saw it too, by the way they behaved, and what they told me. Today, I get the sense that I still am a pushover sometimes, but not because anyone tells me I am. I think something happens to most people as they age and mature. I think they learn that it's more advantageous NOT to tell a pushover what they are. Either that or they just think it's rude. But it seems to me they still take advantage, albeit more silently as adults.

I've become more aware of it, and I can recognize it better now, but it takes me time sometimes to realize what's happening. By the time I figure out I'm being taken advantage of, it's been going on for a while, and that pisses me off. Once I KNOW, I stand up for myself, all bets are off, the gloves come off, and I stand my ground, fighting back if necessary.

Because it does seem that I'm still somewhat of a pushover in certain situations, but will fight back once I know that's what's happening, people tend not to know what to expect from me.

No one though, has ever called me a sociopath. I've been told:

"Your nuts."

"Good for you! It's about time you stood your ground."

"WTF?"

"You're an a**hole."

I don't really worry about any of it anymore. I hate the fact that it still takes me a while to see when I'm being screwed over though.

I tend to be very aloof as opposed to awkward or unusual. I mean, when I do interact I AM a bit odd, but.... well, I'm kind of cute, and it kind of makes up for any oddness. At least, no one's ever minded thus far, but I'm only 24.

Actually, I am capable of adult interactions, just not interactions that are primarily social and lack some other purpose. I can teach a class or have a conversation about one topic, but I can't greet someone without writing the code for the greeting, compiling it, and test-running it in my mind several times before deploying it outwards.

Actually, he follows the rules that make ethical sense to him. In most cases, society, particularly the moral ones, would emphatically disagree that he is moral. In the sense that he uses the words, morals are the rules that society imposes, ethics are the rules that he imposes upon himself. His ethics do not allow him to harm anyone. He doesn't steal, or use others for his own ends. In a sense, you are correct, but not entirely.