Misinterpreting someone's interest in you

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Has anyone else had trouble distinguishing between friendly interest and romantic interest? Particularly if the person displaying that interest in you claims to be straight but sends confusing messages and acts almost as if he/she has a crush on you?

Here are some examples from my own life:

One guy I met kept giving me looks from across the room. Whenever I looked up, he would suddenly look away as if embarrassed. He would touch me on the shoulders and sometimes hug me. If I didn't sit next to him in class, he would give me this sad-eyed look, or call me and ask where I was. He would compliment me all the time on my appearance and how nice I was, and always wanted me to go places with him. When I got a haircut, he touched my hair and said "I like it," in a low voice. Once, he came up to my room and asked if he could sleep there because his roommate had people over for a party. He slept in my bed while I studied at my desk. He had plenty of friends, but I was the one whose room he came to. However, he had girlfriends in the past, hit on a lot of girls and talked about how hot they were, and made some homophobic comments, though he later claimed he didn't mean the things he said. I also heard him make comments on the attractiveness of certain other guys, though he tried to pass it off as a joke. Later on, he tried to convince me to go to a strip club with him. At that point I thought "What the hell does this guy even want from me?" From the beginning, he seemed to single me out from a large group of people, and took a strong interest in me without actually getting to know me. He sent a lot of mixed messages, and the way he acted seemed to change a lot depending on whether there was a large group of people around us. I'm not sure why he took such an interest in me, of all people, since we really didn't have much in common. I regret meeting him, because I feel like I wasted a huge amount of time around someone who didn't want the same things in life, who tried to drag me to places I didn't want to go, and I was supposed to be studying for a big exam at the time anyway.

I've met other guys like this in the past. One guy in high school (a macho, aggressive, hockey player with a cheerleader girlfriend) kept trying to give me shoulder massages and complimented me when I got a new haircut. Sometimes he would come up to me, put his hands on my shoulders, and look deep into my eyes before walking off without saying anything. I was wary of him because I couldn't tell whether he meant it as a joke or not, and he was an aggressive type who I had seen bullying other kids. He had absolutely nothing in common with me, but acted disappointed when I didn't sit with him or respond to his overtures of friendship, and actually invited me to his high school graduation party. He offered to give me rides home from school, and made comments that indicated he had been watching me from a distance as I walked home from school or got a ride from a parent. I avoided him because of the aggression and bullying I saw. I haven't seen him since, but I heard he got engaged to his high school girlfriend. I still don't know why he singled me out.

Who else? A guy in medical school who was actually married, but kept complimenting my appearance and touching me, and kept giving me this big-eyed sad look when I didn't respond to his overtures of friendship (he partied a lot, and I don't drink at all). I avoided him because he reminded me of people I'd met (especially strip club guy mentioned above) who were always trying to push me to blow off studying to go to bars with them and wouldn't back off when I told them no. I was glad I avoided him, because I overheard him talking to another student about smoking pot and later heard rumors that he had been expelled.

I feel like I must be either spectacularly bad at reading people, or else something about me attracts the wrong people. How do you tell whether someone is actually interested in you that way or not, particularly when that person has few inhibitions about touching you, keeps inviting you places, and compliments you a lot? Also, how do you avoid the kinds of people who turn out to be bad for you, without shutting out all the potentially nice people out there?

All the time.

Sometimes it's my own attraction to someone that gets in the way; sometimes it's my own blindness that gets in the way.

I had a major crush on one another student in medical school, who was also in the same college of the university. We spent a great deal of time together, not only on academics, but in our recreational activities, too. We shared rooms in our second year and it was only then that I found out that he was straight. However, we worked very well together as our respective wingmen, and we continue to be good, if geographically distant, friends to this day.

I have always misinterpreted other women's interest in me. Most women are more emotionally expressive, sensitive and affectionate by nature, so it's hard for me to tell the difference between them being friendly and them having romantic feelings towards me. Without going into too many details, my closest friendship from my late childhood/early teens ended in disaster because I had fallen in love with my female friend under the mistaken belief that she had felt the same way about me.

More recently, there is a friend of mine who has proclaimed to being open to dating both sexes (though throughout the entire time we've been friends, she has only dated men). She would always socialize with me by taking me out to dinner and a movie, and told me that she wanted to "be a gentleman" by opening doors for me and letting me enter first into buildings. I was almost positive that she was attracted to me, and once again, I developed feelings for her. When I told her this, she said that she had no idea that I felt that way and let me down gently by telling me in the nicest way possible that she never wanted to date me. Thankfully, it didn't destroy our friendship, because several days after I confessed to her, she messaged me on FB to let me know that things weren't awkward between us and we would still be friends. And she recently stopped by my house to visit with me.

I have another friend, this time over the internet, who gives me virtual hugs and kisses and tells me that she loves me every time we message each other. We have also discussed sexual topics with one another. Based on comments she has made on the websites she's a member of, she appears to be attracted to other women. Though since we have only communicated over the Internet, it's even harder to tell exactly how she feels, so I'm not going to jeopardize our friendship by asking her out like I've done with my other friendships.