What do NT women find attractive in AS men?

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ShamelessGit
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21 Apr 2013, 9:26 pm

I have seen several posts recently from NT women asking for advice on how to deal with their aspie boyfriends. They are aware of all the issues their boyfriends have, but rather than being repulsed, they try harder to understand. I am wondering, and I'm sure most of the guys in the Love and Dating section are too: What attracted you to these men in the first place? I think most of us have the experience that showing any sign of strangeness is an immediate turn off.



sacrip
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21 Apr 2013, 9:46 pm

There's simply no way to answer that, because each woman found something unique in the AS man to love. My girlfriend didn't fall for me because I have Asperger's, but because of who I am and how I presented myself. Part of her attraction was my intelligence, which is arguably a component of my condition, but that's not the same as saying she loves me for my Asperger's.


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billiscool
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21 Apr 2013, 9:49 pm

some of us (aspie guys) are studs. LOL



IlovemyAspie
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21 Apr 2013, 11:31 pm

There was something about him that was different. He was quiet, sweet and smart. He didn't care about fashion-he doesn't dress like a slob but he's not all in to name brand crap. I found him attractive as well. He wasn't trying to hit on me like every other guy, he was a gentleman. There was a chemistry there that I can't explain.


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boywonder
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22 Apr 2013, 4:59 am

Angelic features
Thoughtful outlook
Intelligent conversation
Beaver homing device set to off/low
Career prospects
Kind personality
Mysterious otherworldliness

Action hero comics
Gaming prowess
Smelly unclean body
Rates higher on attractiveness scale than her
Massive penis
Buys dinner



AspieOtaku
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22 Apr 2013, 5:02 am

I dont think anything aspieish makes me attractive to women but women tend to approach me at times anyway and say you got beautiful eyes out of nowhere and im like what?! Where did that come from!? 8O


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appletheclown
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24 Apr 2013, 7:04 pm

AspieOtaku wrote:
I dont think anything aspieish makes me attractive to women but women tend to approach me at times anyway and say you got beautiful eyes out of nowhere and im like what?! Where did that come from!? 8O


Dude, AspieOtaku I get the same exact thing when I get my haircut! I should ask a female hair dresser out sometime. I wonder how many aspies get that same compliment.


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uwmonkdm
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24 Apr 2013, 10:51 pm

boywonder wrote:
Thoughtful outlook
Intelligent conversation
Career prospects
Kind personality
Mysterious otherworldliness
Rates higher on attractiveness scale than her
Massive penis
Buys dinner


pretty much.
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cakey
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25 Apr 2013, 12:08 am

I was interested because he was different. He also didn't seem to follow the trends of other guys at school and I also didn't care about the trends of the girls at school who were mostly boy-crazy. In addition, he was very kind and spoke with big words that made me attracted to him since he seemed so smart. There were people that didn't understand him and tried to go against him, but I know how it feels to have no one really understand you. So I really wanted to understand him and see a part of how his world looked like.


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aaronmullen4
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25 Apr 2013, 12:19 pm

Funny story. I used to take a lot of drugs to rid the confusion or lack of emotional comprehension growing up. And my obsession for the understanding of spirituality, consciousness, and human behavior that lasted for about 5 solid years of study. This is the back ground for the day I met my girlfriend. I was on pain killers (which at the time have me the ability to show my extreme obsession (although she didn't see the obsession)) and we were at the lake. I was talking about a music video called "star shpongled banner" by shpongle. I went into analyzing every detail about how out represented the process of evolution of the mind and the process of learning/passing of wisdom down through generations, and the importance of self control and its potential consequences. As I said my obsession of the matter wasn't "noted" by her, but my intelligence and passion for understanding was what won her over. :) we have been together for 4 years.



aaronmullen4
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25 Apr 2013, 12:22 pm

If anybody wants to discuss any of the above topics feel free to message me I feel we can learn from one another.



AspieOtaku
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25 Apr 2013, 1:38 pm

appletheclown wrote:
AspieOtaku wrote:
I dont think anything aspieish makes me attractive to women but women tend to approach me at times anyway and say you got beautiful eyes out of nowhere and im like what?! Where did that come from!? 8O


Dude, AspieOtaku I get the same exact thing when I get my haircut! I should ask a female hair dresser out sometime. I wonder how many aspies get that same compliment.
I have come to conclusion its all in the eyes because 90% of the time I get compliments about my eyes and have seen other aspies get the same compliments! What is so special about our eyes?! seriously most of us suck at eye contact and when we manage it for brief periods of time its like "oh you have beautiful eyes!"


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AspieOtaku
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25 Apr 2013, 1:38 pm

appletheclown wrote:
AspieOtaku wrote:
I dont think anything aspieish makes me attractive to women but women tend to approach me at times anyway and say you got beautiful eyes out of nowhere and im like what?! Where did that come from!? 8O


Dude, AspieOtaku I get the same exact thing when I get my haircut! I should ask a female hair dresser out sometime. I wonder how many aspies get that same compliment.
I have come to conclusion its all in the eyes because 90% of the time I get compliments about my eyes and have seen other aspies get the same compliments! What is so special about our eyes?! seriously most of us suck at eye contact and when we manage it for brief periods of time its like "oh you have beautiful eyes!"


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Your Aspie score is 193 of 200
Your neurotypical score is 40 of 200
You are very likely an aspie
No matter where I go I will always be a Gaijin even at home. Like Anime? https://kissanime.to/AnimeList


cberg
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25 Apr 2013, 4:29 pm

Quote:
I have come to conclusion its all in the eyes because 90% of the time I get compliments about my eyes and have seen other aspies get the same compliments! What is so special about our eyes?! seriously most of us suck at eye contact and when we manage it for brief periods of time its like "oh you have beautiful eyes!"


Some of us don't just suck at eye contact, we avoid it to a fault. There are infinite systems of reasoning, per individual as to why, but the overarching theme is that it can even lead to very real, physical overexertion (often brought on by freezing up while worried about encroaching on another's personal space). It's not easy to expend much more energy while sitting still.


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IlovemyAspie
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26 Apr 2013, 10:19 am

^^^^

#1 So your ONE encounter with an Aspie means they are all that way? Is that the way we generalize a group of people, by one person?

#2 the guy you described could be any guy, NT or AS. So don't lay all of that crap on the AS doorstep.

#3 your user name????? REALLY?

#4 What was your point of coming on a forum full of people with AS and people who love and are desperately trying to understand them and spewing your garbage?

#6 get ready to get nailed to the wall for your insensitive, inaccurate, rude and down right nasty depiction of Aspies.

I am thoroughly disgusted.


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MacGyverAspie
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26 Apr 2013, 10:31 am

IlovemyAspie,

The user you're referring to has been blocked and posts removed, one of the mods took care of it.