Do any of you deal with feelings of abandonment?

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Question: do any of you deal with feelings of abandonment on a regular basis?

I've always felt very different and like people around me don't understand the way I think and function (probably because of my AS), which has always made me feel very lonely and frustrated. I'm hardly ever lonely due to lack of social interaction but only due to lack of understanding and not being able to exchange my deep and, to me, very important thoughts (not sure if that makes sense?). I also (and I think this is somehow connected to what I've just described) have a tendency to feel like people don't really care about my thoughts and like they don't want to talk about the things I want to talk about. Therefore, I easily feel abandoned and isolated.

I guess no one has really abandoned me lately but the worse things get for me (the more anxious, stressed and depressed I get) and the more stuck/locked in my brain I get, the more I feel like I'm separated from people and abandoned by people in the world. I feel like people don't really want to talk or care when I actually try to reach out ("in real life" and online). It feels like people think I'm too intense and too troubled to deal with.

I don't understand where these feelings of dependence and abandonment come from. I wouldn't say I'm afraid of getting abandoned and I don't go out of my way to try to avoid it, but I still feel disappointed and ignored when people don't seem to care. I almost get angry when it happens because I'm tired of feeling misunderstood or not understood at all. I don't want to feel this way and I'm trying to be independent but since I started to speak about my problems, started to try to share my thoughts and since I started seeking help a couple of years ago, it's like I can no longer be as independent as I used to be. Sometimes I wish I could go back to the time when I kept everything (thoughts and feelings) to myself but that's not really possible right now.

I'm not sure any of this makes sense and I'm not sure if this post is as coherent as I'd like it to be but yeah, any thoughts?

Yes. I deal with feelings of abandonment a lot and also with separation anxiety just like a little kid has if I am not able to contact my brother.

Most of my life, I´ve struggled wit the feeling of abandonement too. (not anymore, though)
It must be that sense of not being understood or being worth nothing.
I even thought, "Why don´t people want to look me in the eye?", until I understood, that I was the one avoiding eye contact.
The sense of abandonment must come from the communicative difficulties.

yes

The abandonment by my parents when I was a young child left at an orphanage was something that took a very long time to resolve. However everyone sooner or later experiences abandonment one way or another. It is part of the human condition. One of the saddest forms it takes is when people abandon themselves - in the most extreme form by suicide, but in the everyday form of total self-invalidation, believing that they are worthless, hopeless, and unworthy of love, and drown themselves in addiction that completes the devastation of the soul.

Thanks for the replies.

I think for me it's about a whole mixture of things. I've been abandoned by people I thought were friends (one time it happened in one of the most cruel of ways and is one of the reasons I never trust people when they say they want to socialise with me or talk to me etc.) and I've been abandoned by people who've said they want to talk to me but then haven't done so etc.

Nowadays I feel like I'm very dependent on psychologists. They're the ones I can talk to about things because people "in real life" don't want to hear about it. I don't like being so dependent on other people but at the same time I feel like I will go insane if I don't get to talk about things like my anxiety or depression or my deep thoughts about life and the universe etc. Is that weird?

Nope, only when I come back to my desk after going to the toilet and everyone else has disappeared for breakfast.

You get over abandonment.

Yes, i have been feeling the way you describe during a lot of periods of my life (like now).

I have abandoned people too, and it is not nice to think about.