Why do some of us have obsessions with people?

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Joe90
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17 Sep 2015, 12:24 am

Ever since I was 11 I started getting obsessed with a particular person or a particular group of people. Not as in sexual, just fascinated.

Why is it that some Aspies have fascinations with certain people? The people I've got obsessed with were just ordinary lower-class people, not famous people or anything. But I still had this unexplainable fascination over them.

It's horrible getting obsessed with people because it can sometimes make you appear as a stalker or a very weird person. But why is it that some of us get so fixated on people? Is there a psychological reason why? Could it be a subconscious way of coping with loneliness and depression in some of us, particularly female Aspies who desire friends?


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starfox
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17 Sep 2015, 3:09 am

Maybe because you want to be a bit like that person? Or they are just real awesome. I'm not sure but I know what you meaneed.


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TheAP
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17 Sep 2015, 7:49 pm

Obsession with people is something that I definitely experience. When I'm obsessed with a person, I think about them all the time, and make up scenarios involving them and spend a long time picturing them in my mind. I create idealized versions of these people in my mind, and am super disappointed when they don't live up to my expectations. There's an element of fear in it too; when I go somewhere, I am nervous that I will see my "think-about" (as I call the people I am obsessed with). This is going to sound really weird, but my obsessions aren't just with people; they can be with places as well.

I have no idea why I have them, or why other Aspies might experience similar things. I think I just have an obsessive personality (if that's a thing), since I tend to obsess over a lot of things.



TheNameless
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18 Sep 2015, 6:19 am

I have obsessions in general but occasionally it will run towards a particular person but normally it is a celebrity or YouTuber not someone I'm likely to see or know in real life since I don't engage with people unless I have to.

It never usually lasts for very long however, as they often do or say something that tips them off the proverbial pedestal I placed them on and my interest wanes. It doesn't take much to turn my enthusiasm to disappointment.

I think it could be my way of living vicariously through that other person or getting some imagined form of social interaction with them as I will imagine scenarios where we know each other or do things etc. things that I would never enjoy or partake in if it were all real.



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18 Sep 2015, 8:07 am

The gifted draws people's attention inevitably over time leading to somebody's obsession. Gifted people are easy to be obsessed by others.


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nikkiDT
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18 Sep 2015, 8:25 am

I get obsessions with people all the time. I've had tons of relationships and friendships that happen solely in my mind. I just wonder what it would be like to be in that person's world. I have this crazy, strong need to know everything about them. But you can never completely know a person, can you? I can't stop thinking about them. But 9.5 times out of 10, it's a person I'll probably never know in my real life.



Jacoby
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18 Sep 2015, 8:41 am

Probably the same reason any of us get obsessed with anything.



Purrbaby
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18 Sep 2015, 8:45 am

I agree with what TheAP said - it's to do with having an addictive/obsessive personality.
I've only ever been obsessed with one person and it was a guy I was romantically interested in. I know that's not so unusual but this went on for over 5 years ! ! Of course I never did or said anything creep/stalkerish to him, but I did think about him a h3ll of a lot. I think my obsession was partly because I was physically attracted to him and partly because I was intrigued by him - I noticed a lot of similarities in our personalities (including the AS stuff). I always wondered if we could be friends, or more. Probably if we were not both married I would have made a move on him, then my obsession might have ended a lot sooner :lol:



nick007
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23 Sep 2015, 10:24 pm

I was obsessed with both my ex girlfriends & a celebrity I have a mega huge crush on. I quit obsessing 1ce I got my OCD treated & never been obsessed with my current girlfriend as a result.


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dossa
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24 Sep 2015, 8:44 am

I go back and forth in regards to why I think I obsess over people. Sometimes I figure it is an OCD thing because I tend to 'thought loop' them. Other times I figure it must be a special interest type of thing. At the moment I cannot recall many other reasons why except wondering if I just liked that person or something. Whatever the reasons might be, this is something I relate to and it is a thing I have been doing for as long as I can recall. Sometimes I obsess over people I am attracted to, sometimes it might be over someone who said a thing that made me laugh. You know, I rarely mind obsessing over people. It can be a guilty pleasure now and then. I figure I am not hurting anyone with my thoughts, so whatever.


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