Are people with Aspergers more likely to commit suicide?
Are people with Aspergers more likely to commit suicide? From the time I was 13 or so until last year (I'm 21 now) I was extremely suicidal. There were times when I would go for months straight thinking of suicide and ACTUALLY planning on doing it. I don't know why, but for once in my life I haven't been suicidal. I can't find any kind of logical answer for why I am not suicidal, but there is a possibility that upon finding out that I have Aspergers and accepting it, I no longer feel "different". I wonder if most people are relieved upon hearing that they have Aspergers? At first it was a shock, and it made me cry because I lost hope of ever falling in love, holding a job, meeting new friends, etc. But now it feels like since I know what I have, I can take advantage of it (my aspergers). I still have hope, I just lack "balls" right now. The thought of me getting a job right now where I'm interacting with people (in all jobs you NEED to interact to a certain extent) just doesn't sound realistic. Anyways, I am just glad that I am not suicidal anymore. I feel like that is one major step ahead. Since learning that I have Aspergers, I have been trying to think more positively and I've been listening to more positive music. Just changing music genres for me has relieved LOTS of anxiety. You wouldn't believe how music can affect your emotions in such a strong way. Anyways... Only time will tell if I will ever acquire the "balls" to step into the "real world".
I'm not suicidal. I wrestled with it some in the past but got over it. It is good to think about something else. Also, don't give up on yourself. God loves you. I also feel really happy for you that you are doing okay after diagnosis. On love, maybe we won't ever find a girl for us, but I just try to remember that I can't get any more single than I am right now. Right now I am single and I am doing okay. If I was to be like this for the rest of my life, it wouldn't be any different.
I don't believe there is the same chemical kind of depression that makes NT's depressed. I mean, we can have those chemical inbalances to but I think the depression is different...more to do with frustrations of trying to function in an environment that isn't designed for us and lonliness.
I think it does help to know that there is a reason....aspergers, and that thrre are others who are different in some of the same ways you are different. I was suicidal from 16-26 and still think of it as a possible solution to the life long delima of being on planet earth. What I changed was not exposing myself to negative things as much as posible. I was a big punk rock fan and used to read a lot more environmental and social issues books. I wish I could be more pro-active in solving the worlds "problems" but realized I had to except this limitation....the more I read about politics and environmental damage, the more I feel like humans are a lost cause,cruel,stuipid,lacking compassion and always will be. That makes me not want to be on this planet and death is the only way I have ever thought I could leave (ship never came,lol). So I have to limit my exposure to such things as they act as a poisen to me.
I haven't abandoned suicide but figure....I will try and learn as much as I can and can always kill myself in the future if I feel I just can't deal with the pain anymore. I try and keep my life balanced with the things that give me some pleasure(my interests) and keep my stressers down as much as possible. You will be surprised by how strong we really can be and how many things you can do that you would have never believed before. Each challenge gives you new strength and faith in yourself. Know your "limits" but don't limit yourself.
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I don't know about more likely. I think a lot of people (NT's too) are suicidal at some point of their lives. I was bad when I was about 13, even doing school reports on it. (And nobody picked up on this WHY?)
Fortunately, by the time I'd reasearched out the method I liked best, I was getting over it.
Without looking at a piece of valid, unbiased data, it's impossible to say whether suicide is more common among people with Asperger's than among the general NT population. I suspect it is higher, not necessarily because there is a chemical link between AS and depression, but because a by-product of AS is social isolation.
Some people with AS can deal with social isolation. Great. But others can't, so that makes them depressed, question the reason for living, and ask themselves if there's any point in carrying on. I've been through all this many times, especially in the last couple of months, as I've realised exactly how socially inept I am, and how little improvement I've made since my diagnosis.
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I hope you don't ever kill yourself krex. If you want you can talk to me sometime if that helps. Suicide to me used to be this neutral thing, I looked at it as a way of escaping. Never did I think that it would hurt the people I know and love. I recently read a thread in "The Haven" that is for a girl named Sophie who committed suicide and used to be a moderator on this site. After reading this I felt sad even though I never knew the girl. I couldn't believe that such a beautiful girl could do such a thing. It shows that we even can feel sad for a person who committed suicide who we never even knew.
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I'm afraid that I AM suicidal (you should look on my computer, I have been writing and planning how to kill myself for ages) and I swear if I have one more bad day I might just carry out one of the plans!! !
But yeah... ever since finding out i had AS at age 13 has sent me into this spiralling depression that just won't go away. And im afraid that I am taking every day as it comes, and if life f***s me up, the only thing I can do is cut myself and cry myself to sleep hoping that it will all go away...
So i guess aspies are more likely to commit suicide, after all i WANT to and one of my friends with AS did...
But yeah... ever since finding out i had AS at age 13 has sent me into this spiralling depression that just won't go away. And im afraid that I am taking every day as it comes, and if life f***s me up, the only thing I can do is cut myself and cry myself to sleep hoping that it will all go away...
So i guess aspies are more likely to commit suicide, after all i WANT to and one of my friends with AS did...
If it helps in any way you can talk to me. I'd hate for someone to commit suicide when I know I could have prevented it.
Once I got out into the real world, I found out that somehow being really friendly and outgoing didn't make me any friends (and might have even made people dislike me). Since then, I've become really lonely and depressed, and I don't have the confidence to talk to people I don't know anymore. The idea of suicide has popped into my head since before I even understood it. I remember several times around when I was ten that when I had a memory of some "shame" I would try to choke or beat myself. A few years later I became more seriously depressed, although I was never really competent enough to know how to commit suicide. More recently I've developed a fondness for sharp objects, and at times I've been close enough to doing something with them.
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By going out in the real world do you mean getting a job?
I think a lot of assumptions that I made in the past were false. For example, when I was in high-school some people used to call me "Patty-Cakes" because my name is Patrick. I thought they were calling me this because I figured they thought that I was a loser. Well, I must have been wrong because I have talked to people online before who I haven't even met and they've called me "Patty-Cakes". I just laugh about it now because I realize how immature it is to call someone a silly name like "Patty-Cakes".
![Laughing :lol:](./images/smilies/icon_lol.gif)
BTW I still feel the urge to hit people when they call me this, but instead I feel sorry for them for being immature mother-BEEPers
Last edited by patrick6 on 17 Apr 2008, 6:01 pm, edited 1 time in total.
That sort of improvement is an organic process, it can only happen gradually over time and expecting to notice it happening is like trying to watch a glacier melt. You may think for a long time nothing's happening, then one day you look back at where you were and realize you've traveled a great distance. Still, you'll never outgrow AS, those reactions and anxieties will always be a part of who you are, but knowing where they originate makes a huge difference in being able to cope and manage them. I wish I had known when I was still a teen, so I might not have wasted so many years feeling like I was just a loser and the fault lay in my individual personality.
Some of the social isolation can be more or less consciously self-imposed. My dad was a minister when I was a teen, so I was a part of the local youth group whether I liked it or not, and I feel lucky that in the last half of high school I was thrown into a group of (mostly) NTs who were as accepting and friendly to me as anybody had ever been. It went a long way toward helping me deal with the invisible wall. Even so, I remained on the fringes still. Though I was learning to accept my peer group and they me, truth be told, there's only so much socializing an autie can take without a meltdown. I guess what I'm saying is, be careful what you wish for. I too, wished for love and marriage, and finally got it. I'm on my third now, and I pine constantly for my solitude. There are worse things in life than being alone. Like never having the sense of proud accomplishment and self confidence that comes from being on your own.
As far as the suicide stats, I couldn't guess, but I will say this: When I have those dark moments, it's no longer about social isolation. It's about being able to function in a work environment, and finding a job in a field I'm qualified for that won't be obsolete as soon as next week's technology comes out. It's about hating the humiliation of being dependent on others and the frustration of trying to find a way to stand alone and survive as an individual. Screw finding a girlfriend, try worrying about how you're going to keep a roof over your head and food in your belly without ending up in a homeless shelter. You solve those problems, you can rent a girlfriend.
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