Right now life is not worth living/ might as well end it:<

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Im not a troll this is quite reall

Right now i think i ought to just commit suicide. I have been so incrediblity drugged against my will that i am essentially brain dead, i have no thoughts in my head i experience just the outside world
I dont see the point of living this way.

i have drugged to the point of being made nt.
let me explain as have wierd gaba system
the drugs i was forced on screwed with gaba. I now get social cues(believe me it aint worth it0
i am not acuatlly suicidle but rather the thought(or feeling or whatever is left of me) of living as a brain damaged nt is appealing. Countinuieng to live a empty pointless existance with no joy or intellect or anything is not appealing i can no longer sleep properly, i dont enjoy food, or feel any desirea for the opposite sex or much of anything else.

me being rational sounding is incredibly bad
i was overdramitic and grandiose and not

I got obbsessed with calling some friends i made at that clinic, they said they could help
One acutaully promised to give me a place to stay and job at his company, for reall he had mansion. and i would have had a great life
but well i waited to long( and he met a girl, is divorcing his wife and selling his house
and moving. It was my fantasy and it came true, now it seems mundane and pointless even
i could go with him there would be no point, brain dead here is the same as brain dead there
but it slowly dawn on me that my problem is medical now


I have another friend who linked me up with one of the best neuroligists on the planet but....
fixing a broken brain is impossible

Is is really worth living as a brain damaged non person
having lost everything i am the way that i am


i couldnt really do it(phyically or mental) but
living like this

From what you said, it's the meds that are lousing you up, not the "brain damage." If the person you're seeing now doesn't wither take you off them or change them, get a very clear statement of why, analyze it for yourself if the meds let you, and if necessary get a second opinion. One person to ask is the pharmacist when you get the prescription filled.

Pat, on lithium too long when I wan't bipolar, just stressed.