Ever make up figures of speech on the fly?

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I have a tendency to mangle figures of speech, or just make them up entirely.

Once when we were trying to get out of the house but it was taking a long time, I exclaimed when we finally got out the door, "Off we go like a herd of turtles." (It actually came out "off we go like a turd of hurdles." Spoonerisms are fun )

Another time, I was trying to explain to someone that their approach was unnecessarily difficult so I told him, "You're trying to mow the lawn through the fence."

Anyone ever done this? What were they?

Often.

Others like them, but they're actually just the result of me misunderstanding figures or mixing them up.

I'm generally assessed as doing fine with figures of speech so I guess I'm not that bad.

I've done a few. Only one comes to mind at the moment, though. Some guy was going to mount a brand new radio in his piece of junk, worn out van. I said, "That's like mounting a diamond in a turd!" One of my friends was laughing his head off when he heard me say it.

I don't know if it counts but I tend to mix German and English figures of speech regularly. "I won't be there soon. It is jottweedee." alternatively: "where fox and rabbit say goodnight to each other." This kind of things. I occasionally make up new ones as well. Mostly because I don't think how it is correctly. All I can think of now as exampl is: "Fast as... something which is really fast"

I do this all the time, either using literal interpretations of metaphors "the feline has been released from the sack" (you let the cat out of the bag), using words that sound similar "Let's get this shoe on the toad" (Let's get this show on the road), combining two metaphors that mean similar things, or metaphors that turn back on themselves as fast as something that turns back on itself really fast. Combine that with my spacey personality and everybody thinks I'm crazy

I make up words and expressions all the time.

Like Humpty Dumpty from Alice in Wonderland I ask "who is to be the master?"

A word means what I mean it to say.

I play all sorts of word games with my young grandchildren.

They ask "make me a cheese sandwich"

I tap them on the head and say "you are a cheese sandwich"

It makes them stop and think it through.

yes. the spoonersisms are increasing with age. I'm not great at remembering examples though.

I once said in my fanfiction "I need to recharge my batteries" meaning the character needed a break from her son because she was getting too stressed out so she needed a break from her job. I am not sure if I made that up or not. It just came to my mind as I wrote it.


I have also said "Stuck in the mud" since I was 16 meaning I couldn't get my body to move. I have never heard anyone else use it except for when they were referring to the tag game little kids play in PE. Fun times.

I coined the term 'a$$ caneage' tonight, to refer to the amazing speed with which I wear out jeans. Does that count? I thought it was funny. It's brings the visual of my body beating (caning) the jeans into submission.
Also 'grindage' for food, but I stole that one.

I once made up "asspie" but I see I'm not the only one who has come up with that word. I have seen it in someone's blog. It's an a**hole with AS. I have made up other terms like baspie which is a bad person with AS, jerkspie which is a jerk with AS, bullspie which is a bully with AS, and bitchspie which is a b***h with AS.


I love making up aspie terms using the word aspie. I also do the same with Spokane and so does my bf. Spokeofficer, spoketicket, Spokeaspie, and we did the same thing with Yakima. Yakofficer, Yakticket. I noticed on iCarly in one of the shows, they were also using terms using Yakima but they sure came up with better terms than my bf and I.

One of my favorites is when someone mentions a large amount of money, to comment 'That'll buy a lot of jelly babies'. I'm pretty sure I made that one up. (I think it was back when I was going through a Doctor Who phase.)

I do all the time. The ones I can remember are

"f**k me freddy, no spaghetti!" when something goes wrong

or

"geez louise with ice cream"

Yeah, I make up my own metaphors all the time (like the lady at the mall, swathed in clouds of perfume, who smelled "like a Juarez whorehouse in July"). Some folks look at me like I just spoke Old High Martian, but hey, it's no skin off my ears.

I do that.

I say 'Mental Diarrhea' to mean nonsense or stream of consciousness text. Apparently, this doesn't make immediate sense.

fizzy blood = pins and needles sensation.
I first came out with that years ago. All my friends use it now.
There are more, but I can't think of them at the moment.