can someone explain Asperger to me

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I was diagnosis with PDDNOS as a kid,and later got
Diagnosis with Developmentally Delayed and Learning Disability.
but I don't understand Asperger,at one side you
have Aspergers who do very well,and seem nearly NT.
on the other side,you have Asperger who struggle in life.
Yet,both have the same conditions.

or take two Aspie men,One has a wife,good friends,does well socially,
the other is single,has no friends(or few),struggles to fit in,
Yet both have Asperger. So,what is Asperger,any ways.
why does it effect people,so differently?

Last edited by billiscool on 14 Feb 2014, 1:11 am, edited 2 times in total.

It is a spectrum. Some have worse symptoms than others.

I would understand it better maybe if it was done on something like a 1-10 scale.
Like 1 being severely autistic and 10 being mildly autistic.
Along those lines id say im a 5.

But yeah, gets a little confusing.
But it was that way in the special needs school i went to .
Some kids were severely autistic and some seemed practically NT and then there was everything in between.
I will say with the ones who seemed practically NT, they sill had social problems, behavior problems and or learning disabilities. It was like close to NT, but no cigar.

The big difference between classical autism and Asperger's Syndrome is that with Asperger's you can't have a clinically significant speech delay, and you aren't meant to have delays in being able to take care of yourself or in basic cognitive skills.
So in everything else, you could have all the other autistic symptoms quite severely, and still meet the criteria for AS rather than Autistic Disorder.

Asperger is a spectrum.What does that mean?

It has different variations and degrees, like the rainbow spiral behind me in my avatar

Due to different causes, your brain works partly not the way it does with NTs.

The front part area is the one that is most responsible for many of our social habbits and doings. Many things in there simply work automatic and instinctive: As example babies tend to listen to human voices automatically more focused then to other noises. As well that faces are from the beginning more interesting to babies, then other objects. There simply is an instinctive knowledge in the brain that tells even toddlers: "Face! Important because involves information!" As well that tons of other stuff runs there automatically, as example the recognition of so called "micro-face-expressions", that are simply face movements that are done so short, that by will you dont really recognize them, but the instinctive part of your further brain does.

Depending on how much different your brain works, so just like being shortsighted, there is much differency, this can cause you to have only slighter problems with that social stuff, that can easily be catched up by your cognitive rest of your brain. (So the part you control on will.) As well that it can be a bit more complicated, but still can be replaced by your cognitive brain, but with more effort, so you get tired from doing so. While on the complete end of the spectrum, it might affect you so much, that neither can you recognize as example any faces, nor can you replace that by will.

So if you are able to "undo" your disabilities, depends on how much you are affected, and how well the cognitive part of your brain works. If your "automatical face recognizer" is wrecked, then replacing that with simple cognitive knowledge is normally more easier if you have normal or higher IQ, then for someone that has as example IQ70.

That overloading of informations, most Aspergers suffer, is as well mostly due to our sh***y "social brain centre". In NTs its as well responsible for filtering informations: So by ears, eyes, skin ... it receives as example 2 dozend informations, they get filtered and only the relevant ones get delivered to your cognitive part. As example if you are an NT and sit in a crowd and talk to someone, then the NT is focused on the person he talks with. Any noises and other people talking, get automatically faded a bit, while the words of the opposite will be delivered normal. That simply leads to being able to understand people easier, while being in a crowd, so its less complicated, and less burdening, as for an Asperger. The Asperger has no or not such a good filtering, so he receives far more information, that he done needs to filter on purpose, which is more effort/burdening.

When it comes to the part of your brain, stored for using informations, then Autist seem to have another kind of storage. You could compare it with Windows and say their "Defragmentation" system does not work. In opposition to NTs their storage system leads to them being far more widespread. So any kind of informations are linked to far more other informations. That can be useful if you do a certain math-problem, and automatically think of hundreds of factors influencing that. But if you simply want to do an 0815 everyday task, that simply needed you to focus on one single thought, it sucks horrific. ^^

Again how much that effects you, depends on how deep are you in the spectrum, so how much nonsense braincells connection do you have. And on your general IQ, so if your brain is able to work with more or less information at once.

That typical synergies, some autists/Aspergers have is caused by that additional connections. So as example due to this problems, the autists braincells, that stored the memory about the recognizing of the colour blue are as well linked with braincells, having the job to recognize emotions. Which leads to "Blues feels comfortable" or "Blue feels scary..."

What I meant with missing "de-fragmantation program" was that NT as well often get such unusual links. So on accident they hear a certain noise, when doing a certain action, and then in the beginning doing that action will be linked to hearing that noise. But NTs have some kind of room-cleaner in their brain, that automatically checks their wiring from now and then, and disconnects braincell links, that have not been used for a long time. So as example the braincell connection of "hearing a certain noise" on accident, "when doing a certain action", simply will be removed after some time. This room-cleaner/de-fragmentation system seems to work as well worser with autists/Aspergers, again it depends on how deep you are in the spectrum.

Aspergers does not make up your whole personality. Different people will handle the condition differently. AS people can be very different, indeed, and some will experience less hardship in life than others.

Technically, you can't have an ASD if you're "doing well".

You know, because the symptoms preclude doing well in the first place.

The best one can hope for is "getting by" when there's supports in place.

Don't pay attention to self-proclaimed "aspies" on the 'net who're doing everything a normal person does. They don't have it.

I guess it depends on what 'doing well' means.

Doing well would mean (as an adult):

Having friends in person and/or a partner (most people tend to have both there)
being able to work and/or study
and being independent

All of those, and you don't have all that much trouble doing these things in comparison to your peers.

I do have friends, but it is burdening to me to engage with them personally more then once a week or with more then two of them at the same time, as well that stuff like "He, is it ok if I came over that evening." simply does not work with me. I need to plan and know about stuff we do, to feel comfortable with it. For many people it feels burdening, that they need to plan that much ahead, when engaging with me.

I have a partner, which I found after already giving up on dating/relationship, due to the needed effort (so all that anyway miserable faking to be an NT), not being in any relation to the so called benefits of an relationship. (A boyfriend, nagging me 24 hours a day to behave like an NT.)

I am able to work, but lots of works are too burdening for me and I either needed to cancel them, because of them being to burdening or I get cancelled due to typical social problems. Actual I work, having my own office, that is additional (because of the companies office building too small) not in the office part, but has been built afterwards in a part of our storage facility. Because of that people normally communicate with me via Email, and only come in person if its necessary, as well that they normally ask before, when I have time for it, to avoid going the way through the storage facility, only to meet my empty office, or me being to busy right now. As well that because, hardly anyone visiting me personally, I can wear earplugs. I am my own departement, so I do not get bothered with social stuff or teamwork, as long as the "numbers are correct". So on good days, I come to work, greet the storage worker and dont see anyone the rest of the day. XD On bad days we have departement meetings, and I come home worn out, because of that two hours of nonsense blabbering and need additionally to cancel anything I planned on the weekend, simply because I will need to rest because of that sh***y 2 hours meeting during week, to be able to work efficient again next week.

I am independent, as long as my daily routines dont get disturbed. Even the place of my tooth-brushing-gel is part of my routines.

In comparison to my peers, they dont need to avoid 75% of offered works, dont need to waste their weekend on gathering ressources after a sh***y meeting, dont need to plan everything two weeks before, "simply do their houseworks" without needing any routines for it, that can get disturbed, ...

Pretty much everyone has nagging problems with the usual social, vocational/academia and independence.

The person with an ASD (mildest), at his or her best, can only really manage to do one or two of these things with help. Not all three without help (all three with help would be exceedingly rare, and these are the "success stories" you hear of; you don't hear many of those).

That's how the cookie crumbles with a disorder.

If they work in an accommodating place and have an understanding partner they would be able to work and have a partner. Which of course comes independence.

now I see.
well, I don't know about aspies not being able to live independent lives, but I agree that for a diagnosis there has to be some impairment. Lots of antissocial math loving guys or introvert social awkward people or robot like computer geeks say that have aspergers without evaluation or symptoms or impairments or really knowing what it really is and that's plainly annoying.

This.

Aspies differ by degree of their autistic traits ( up and down on the autism scale), and differ laterally by personality (like NTs vary in personality and character), and in aptitudes. And they vary in their outward environment,circumstances, upbringing, education and in much else. So (as with NTs) their life outcomes vary considerably.