how to feel loved?

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Not how to know when I'm in love. I know that one. Not how to show it- I think I am doing that right. But how to feel it when people love you back?

I never felt loved by anyone my whole life, and it's all I ever wanted. I assumed it was because no one ever did love me because there's something wrong with me and I just couldn't figure out what it was. But I'm thinking maybe it's not that... maybe people have loved me, and I just couldn't tell. It's sort of a crappy line of thought because that means I can't keep hoping to find someone who will love me... if I do find someone who loves me, I won't know it, and I'll keep looking.

I hate coming here and asking this- I don't like this forum very much. But everyone else just treats me like I'm some kind of an idiot and/or don't believe or understand me when I ask about it. So I don't know where else to go.

LOL....what's wrong with this Forum? I find that it's a mixed bag--and I ignore the idiots.

About feeling loved.....hmmmm....that's a hard one.

Do you feel secure when you're around your family, your friends, your lover/spouse? Do you feel trust? I believe experiencing security/trust is essential if one is to feel "love."

Do you feel a commonality with a person? Does a person express a commonality with you? That's a part of "love," too.

Also: in a sexual/romantic sense, do you feel satisfied with being with your lover, in how your lover caresses you? Do you feel that sense of euphoria which accompanies intimacy--whether you're actually engaging in lovemaking or not? Truthfully, I haven't felt THAT in years. The last time was in 2000.

I think, by and large, that "feeling like you're loved" is akin to feeling like you could trust the person/people with whom you are in constant contact--and feel secure in their presence as well.

To be secure around somebody is to trust them implicitly. You know the person's "got your back." Romantically, you feel "secure" in your person's arms, and a person feels secure in your arms. You just feel that harm will not come your way.

Of course you can't trust anybody "unconditionally"--but one could come mighty close.

I've experienced "euphoria"--so I know what I'm talking about here. You just have to experience it for yourself to "know."

Perhaps, if you start feeling less "bored," you might experience "love" more.

If someone senses that you're bored with them, there's no reason for that person to feel love for you. There's no incentive for anybody to extend themselves towards you in a manner which could lead to "love."

I used to get bored quite easily myself. After a while, it became "boring" to be bored; hence, I decided to explore why I was bored so often. I came to the conclusion that I had to employ more flexibility in my assessment of things--use my cognition to search for, and find an alternative to the boredom. Once I started doing that, my mind expanded, and my tolerance for boredom expanded.

Women's bodies run the gamut, actually.

You should go to an art studio sometime. You'll see various types of women's bodies. Some seem grotesque--but even the grotesque is fascinating.

Ive never felt loved either and struggled with this in relationships. In the past I felt unsure whether people loved me and felt unable to tell.

However Ive come to the conclusion that I would know if they love me enough (for it to be worth continuing the relationship). I now think those who I was unsure about did not really loved me or only had a small amount of love (or just desire).

I used to think I did not having the ability to recognize it but after long introspection I now am pretty sure my parental family does not love me, and Im also pretty sure some of my children do love me. I can see my children love me by how their faces light up when they see me and they want me to hug them and cuddle up together (where as my mum and my exes faces fell when they saw me lol)

So in the future I would look out for the person looking very happy to see me and wanting to spend time with me and wanting to be touching.

Lotus makes a good point. Lotus flowers are beautiful.

I don't recall ever experiencing the sensation of "feeling" someone love me, except in a small way, my pets. I believe my father may love me, but I don't "feel" it. I think my siblings just feel a family obligation to maintain a relationship with me, and I feel the same way about them. I also don't think I am capable of having loving "feelings" for anyone. My mother passed away some years ago. She had some mental health issues that were never addressed. I don't think she was ever really capable of loving anyone, but at least, now we know about her mental health problems, I can understand and deal with that better. I have never sought out or received romantic attentions from anyone. I am solitary by choice, so I am not interested in that.

I also feel less stressed when alone, and greatly stressed when with other people, so I am a hermit.

Love is someting that you have. It doesn't really feel any different if someone loves you back or not. It is something that gives. Something you spread around. someting you feel, and it feels the same. You don't take it, and you don't get more if someone gives it to you. It is not money. This is not a bank account. Either you have it, or you don't. There are plenty enough people in the world that get treated like total crap. They can still love that person. When the day comes that you stop loving. That little love triangle ends.

Start off by learning to love yourself as much or more as you've felt love for others. When you love yourself, you'll know what it feels like to be loved & then have a baseline for comparison to be able to tell by others' words and actions if they do in fact love you.

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No for supporting trump. Because doing so is deplorable.

Unless you feel the need to feed off of other peoples anguish, and dispare in order to fill up your supply, and make yourself feel good. You can love, and everything can be subject to change.