Why Do People Refuse To Practice Social Skills?

Post Reply New Topic

There you go again with the misinterpreting and accusing me of doing what you're doing. I didn't say that I was refusing to change my mind, I said you would not be changing it with the way you're going about things. Had you engaged me without all the willful misinterpretation and projecting and had your argument been compelling enough I might have at least considered your stance. Nor did I say that you are stubborn for sticking to your views. I said "You have made it very clear that you are going to stubbornly stick to your own views regardless of anything I say." where the important part you're neglecting is "regardless of anything I say.". This refers back to the fact that you haven't be responding to the things I'm actually saying and instead rely on misinterpretations, word twisting and various fallacies. Simply put, I am not saying that you are stubborn for sticking to your views, I am saying you are stubborn for refusing to even listen to what I'm saying and twisting my words in order to stick to your views. These are two different things.
I didn't ask you to stop standing on your hill either. That would imply that I am asking you to change your position and/or stop having strong convictions about it, which I am not because it's already clear that nobody will be changing their mind here. I asked you to agree to disagree. You can stay on your hill and I will stay on mine, but we acknowledge that we are on different hills and neither of us will be joining the other on their respective hill.

I could make the same argument, and claim that you're stubbornly sticking to your views regardless of anything I say.

I'm not twisting your words, I'm scrutinizing them. Scrutiny is not obfuscation. And I'd stick to my views regardless. You keep inventing new narratives to accuse me of, and while it's creative, it's still untrue.

Agreeing to disagree is a privilege I reserve for subjective opinions - what flavor of icecream is better, what car is cooler looking, who makes the best pizza in town, etc. I will not agree to disagree on matters of fact, or where I have every reason to believe it is true, based on facts. This is part of my conviction, and asking me to act contrary to that is asking me to compromise my conviction.

I think see where part of your misunderstanding is though. I'm not trying to change your mind. I'm just stating why I disagree. I don't expect you to change your mind. I'm just saying why I won't change mine.

You've asked me to agree to disagree. I've declined. Moving on

A valid point about being a novice / beginner I heard tonight. As a novice, with no previous experience, you don't even know how little you even know. After you learn for a while, you start to realize just how much you didn't know, and still don't know. It's at this point where people may give up, cos finding out how much they don't know, even with everything they've learned, can certainly make someone feel like they aren't learning, and will never learn.

In reality, when you've learned enough that you KNOW how bad you are, that means you have in fact learned. Key point - you've now learned enough to self-assess. However, realistically, most people don't realize this, and rather than realizing it means they've made progress, they see it as "proof" they will never be good at it, cos they've "realized" they're terrible at it.

But, of course you're terrible at it, you're still new. But you've learned enough basics to be able to tell the difference between doing it well and doing it poorly. Which itself can be used as a springboard to further improve, knowing that you now know how to tell if you are even improving or not. Realizing you are in fact bad at something isn't the end of the journey - it's just the beginning. Keep moving forward.

Asking someone to agree to disagree is often merely a polite way of saying your arguments aren't persuasive and I've lost interest in waiting for them to become persuasive.

And everyone who's participated has been forced to practice their social skills whether they realized it or not.

Again: I didn't say that I was refusing to change my mind, I said you would not be changing it with the way you're going about things. Had you engaged me without all the willful misinterpretation and projecting and had your argument been compelling enough I might have at least considered your stance.
A scrutiny is a careful examination while twisting words is to rephrase what's been said in a way that changes the meaning. You have very much been doing the latter. Though, I suppose you might have to do the former in order to do the latter. I'm not "inventing new narratives to accuse you of" either. I'm restating the same things I've been saying basically this whole time. And they're still true, as well as fairly obvious.
Your last three paragraphs seem to contradict one another. Ignoring that you still don't seem to grasp what agreeing to disagree actually means - You say that you decline to agree to disagree yet you also say "I'm not trying to change your mind. I'm just stating why I disagree. I don't expect you to change your mind. I'm just saying why I won't change mine." as well as "Moving on" which seems to imply that you wish to end this debate and intend to cease responding. Which sounds like you're agreeing to disagree.


This is very much true.