How do YOU (usually) make friends?

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I be myself and try to be friendly and nice and helpful,but not overly nice,friendly,or helpful.Most people actaully like my goofiness and wildness and slightly outgoing nature and how I can be serious when I need to be.


-SpaceCase

Dunno; people generally approach me. So, most likely by being so pathetic-looking that I seem approachable. ((I'm not kidding- something about me sitting alone at a table and reading seems to make people want to "rescue" me.))

Also joining clubs. God bless clubs.

I talk to people. I approach NT's more than they approch me, but it's unlikely that I get a friend out of it.

For the friends I have I really don't know how it happened. I'll have to pay more attention in future.

Hmmm, most of the time I make friends when everyone is new to something - so you get there and everyone's freaking out, I always feel confident about approaching people in that situation, or talking to people who do approach me. If I just sit down somewhere and someone sits next to me then I'll start talking or I might approach a few people and ask a general question like "what's the time" or something simple like that and keep talking from there. Usually the other person starts talking and I just continue and usually you get talking about something interesting for both of you so it develops from there.

I feel that way, too. I usually prefer to let other people approach me, since I have yet to initiate a conversation that didn't make me seem dumber than dirt. (I like that phrase!) Although the one time I actually went out of my way to talk to someone, we became (and still are) pretty good friends, so I might try that again. I always like to think that I am pretty friendly, but what I've come to discover is that my idea of friendly is the opposite of whoever I'm talking to. Most days I'm okay being by myself.

Often, I just ask people what musical groups they like, and if I like the group or know some facts then I'd share my knowledge with them- and I'd expect them to do the same.

I'm with Serissa. I don't initiate conversations, other people do. When I do speak first, it's usually just a single word greeting or ask a question.

I get the "she looks so sad and lonely sitting by herself, I think I'll save her" thing a lot, but it never results in lasting friendships. More like uncomfortable, awkward affairs where I'm invited into a group for a couple encounters, but I can't relate to them, feel obligated to go back but am really wishing I was alone again. Eventually they interpret my complete lack of initiating contact as a sign I don't like them, and start leaving me alone. Unfortunately that sometimes only happens after the "are you shy or do you just hate us?" conversation.

Nah, my real friends, I make by observation: watching them in a social context, observing enough of their behavior to get a sense of their code of values and their psychological mindset. And then once I know they're someone I like, I start approaching them and trying to be nice to them. Offer help, ask questions, and hope it gets returned.

I usually never initiate conversation unless the person is holding one of my favorite books, or one of my weird sci-fi movies. Otherwise, if you show cleaveage, they will come.

Humor.

Well, mostly people make a friend of me, not the other way round. Someone I've been chatting to regularly will suddenly ask me to come round and I'll be surprised and pleased.

However, recently I made the effort to make the first friendly overtures to two people. I just began saying hello to them and passing the time of day, and we gradually became more familiar and at ease with one another and developed inside jokes etc.

I tend to get to know them through my existing friends, though my most recent friend was in many of the same classes as me, and I had no friends in many of those, so we sat next to each other. Also we were in the same form group and she knew one of my friends anyway. We clicked, and from then on it's been great

When I started Upper School I had a couple of friends, but we weren't close anyway. At that time a girl befriended me, and we clicked. I think that's how it's always been, even when meeting new friends through my existing ones - wait for them to befriend me, then we can click. I have to click with the person though, otherwise it's never going to work. Even my proper online friends, I had to click with them.

for me, i just find a general thing we have in common, like if we do a sport together or if we listen to the same kind of music. then we (hopefully) hit it off. i've actually had much more success with doing that this year than in the past! luck maybe?

People that get approached by others are very very lucky!

I wish I got that, it would save a lot of stress.

I generally look pissed off when I'm relaxed, and may sometimes come off as aggressive and ready to be combative when nervous, so I almost never get approached. So usually only get approached by people who know how to get others to let their guard down, and I learned a loooooong time ago not to fall for that BS. So basically nothing comes of people approaching me. The only exception is that I usually give people a chance at private events that I feel comfortable at such as Boy Scout events or occasionally a church. I tend to do best making friends when I'm introduced to someone by a friend or someone else I consider relatively trustworthy.

Shared Misery.